Thursday, November 16, 2006

O.J. Simpson To Reveal How He Would Obtain A PlayStation 3

On the eve of the sales launch of the new PlayStation 3, O.J. Simpson is planning to reveal how he would, theoretically, obtain one of the highly coveted, hard-to-acquire video game consoles.

In his new book, "If I Gamed," Simpson tells how he would go about securing a PlayStation 3 for purchase, given that the initial supply of consoles when they go on sale will be far exceeded by demand.

In the book's first chapter, "Payback For 2," Simpson laments how he was "disrespected" and "wronged" by what he feels was, hypothetically, an unsatisfactory gaming experience he would have probably had if he had ever owned and played a PlayStation 2. In the book's later chapters, Simpson outlines how he would, theoretically, "make sure [he] would get a PlayStation 3 when it first goes on sale and use it to get revenge for all of the past injustices [he] endured at the hands of the PS2."

The book's final chapter, "If They Run Out At Best Buy, You Must Kill A Guy," details how Simpson would deal with a console shortage. "If they were all sold out before I got to the front of the line," writes Simpson, "I would, hypothetically, follow the guy who bought the last one out to his car. Then I would go into a wild rage and black out. When I came to, I'd be sitting on my couch, playing my brand-new PlayStation 3. It would be kind of difficult, though, because my hands would be all bandaged and bloody. But that's how I would do it."

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